Big mistake fried chicken king. Yes your unmistakable 11 Herbs & Spices are delicious AND have an equally delicious aroma but your attempt to replace the traditional fireplace fire and smell that comes with it is nothing short of blasphemy.
For $18.99 KFC is selling a Enviro-Log produced firelog made of 100 percent recycled materials that smells like fried chicken. Their mistake is not with the smelling fried chicken. Their mistake is attacking fires and the fireplace.
“…finally puts to rest the age-old dilemma, “How can I make this fire a hundred bajillion times better?”
“Pick up a firelog today, and you’ll be wondering how you were ever able to enjoy a fire that didn’t smell like fried chicken.”
Those lines are fighting words.
There’s nothing that compares to the emotional attachment everyone has with the comfort that a roaring fireplace provides.
You want to sell fried chicken-scented car hanging thingies, by my guest. Fried chicken-scented plugins, or bathroom spray? Sure, I’ll allow it.
Do not come for my fireplace. Ever.